Living Mindfully: Mindfulness is Not Something We Can Learn in a Day

You cannot Adult Right without Mindfulness

A lot of what we call 'life' happens when we're transitioning from a child into an adult who is responsible for getting all their shit done.

For some it could be moving out of town for college, learning how to live alone whilst managing a job, getting married into a different culture, etc (basically our 20's, when we reroute education based on choices & not compulsion).

As we grow into life, we witness so many changes while having to reconsider our own behavioural patterns & habits of reciprocation.

Because after all, these actions are what determine the future now when we're being our own parent!

Change, The Butterfly Effect & Mindfulness

Whether or not you believe in the butterfly effect, you must've seen how your decisions in the recent past have shaped your present.

How it could've gone the other way, how you could've done better or escaped the worse.

For me, change doesn't come easy but it drains me, overwhelms me into thinking---

"What if I'm going too fast? Am I really built for it? What if once I accept this & DO change, life just MAKES me go the opposite way?"

I won't lie, there have been moments when I've felt like slowing down, giving up & going back to my comfort zone.

But hey, comfort zone isn't where one grows, right? So this is where mindfulness will come into play!

Change makes us uncomfortable for a reason

Stopping should not be an option when change overwhelms you. But neither is ignoring your own instincts that are making you uncomfortable.

If you find yourself in a situation where change is overwhelming you, do not be too afraid to face it.

Do not let it cloud your judgement to an extent that it makes you indecisive.

Slow down, but do not stop questioning WHY you're facing it.

What's your reason?

This talk about being met with change and dealing it makes me think of all the times when I indulged in things (as an adult responsible for her own actions) that have shaped my present without actually knowing it's significance in that time.

I would've have to make a choice no matter what, because life happens to all of us whether we want it to or not. At a pace that's not always necessarily in our hands.

But was I doing it mindfully, indulging in the things life threw at me? Or was I just being a kid about it?

Don't ignore your intuition & be patient with yourself!

Mindfulness isn't something we can learn in a day. It takes practice no matter how organised, disciplined we think we are.

However, it doesn't mean limiting our experiences- just learning how to be fully present in the moment right now, good or bad. You & your experiences are the company that stay with you for life.

Our intuition will always try to connect with us to guide us better. 

Just don't be TOO CASUAL with the energy, especially if your intuition is trying to guide you otherwise 🙂

Fiction was my best friend as a child, but it’s a blessing and a curse at the same time...

I read my first novel in 3rd grade. It was a thriller/mystery. Reading as a hobby has been in my family for at least 2 generations now. In fact, my 2 siblings and I have inherited the exact taste in genre as my father!

Our school library only lent books to students in grade 6 and above. But since I had an elder sister with the very same hobby, I got an access to a huge collection of fiction books, way more early than the other kids.

Scholastic book fairs became sorta religious for us. We even borrowed unusual number of books from our friends who didn’t like reading much.

And the only stall we visited in our small town’s annual trade fair was: the book stall. Where else could you find a plethora of second-hand books at such cheap rates?

About a decade back.. my sister, brother and I wanted to place an online order for a few books from our favourite author that the three of us had been waiting to lay our hands on since ages! Mom and dad asked us to wait til the finals got over. But we couldn’t wait...

So we searched for pirated copies on the internet. We then sneaked into dad’s office and printed 3 novels that day! We got a big-ass lecture and (well-deserved) verbal thrashing for wasting so much paper.

My favourite author, Sir only-wrote-18-books-and-passed-away became a god-sent for an introvert child like me, who spent almost no outdoor time as an adolescent.

All of his books had a strong female protagonist as the lead character. These books took me to places and times that I had only read about in History and Geography books. The insane amount of detailing when it came to human psychology used to make me gasp with surprise

Unlike most kids, by the time I was in 9th grade, I knew what Multiple Personality Disorder was. I never gave another genres a serious try. They weren’t just worth it after I’d swam in the murder-mystery-fiction waters.

I always had my head in the clouds growing up, living in a parallel universe. I’d be sitting in the school bus dreaming about going to a school, very different than mine. Where there was sub-par infrastructure and much more cooler people around.

I wouldn’t call it all bad, because at the very young age of 9 years, I had planned a novel with my two best friends. We divided the tasks: who would write it, who would be doing the illustrations, help us get it printed and distributed, and what not!

Also Read: An Open Letter to My Parents for If & When I Get Married

While getting over my very first SO after a non-consensual breakup… every time I had an emotional outbreak and felt like reaching out, fiction helped me become strong and not do it. It took a lot of self-control… almost to the brink of insanity. I’d tell myself that he’s dead, so I can’t do it.

Planned a funeral in my head and everything. Crazy, right? I would not recommend it, even though back then it helped me not step back into a dangerous territory.

Confusing fiction with reality subconsciously became an ugly habit overtime. Every time I was scared of trying something new, I’d tell myself that I do not necessarily need to indulge in it, because life can go on without any possibility of me landing in a similar situation.

I am aware about this habit today, and it still creates problems for me sometimes. Running away from reality only makes acceptance difficult. It’s delusional. And it’s a lot of work to get my brain off that track even when I know I’m doing it.

Have you been in my shoes? If so, when did you realise you were doing it, and how did you get rid of it? Let me know in the comments below! :)

Also Read: Question: How Do You Define A Good Piece Of Art?