About Me

What Is "That Candor Girl"?

A personal blog created in March 2015, this space can be considered a synopsis of my life.

As a blogger, I do not have anything NEW to offer to you. No extravaganza, no knowledge intensive articles. It's just the usual D2D for any other person from my generation. 

Candor is one of the five factions in the
rousing-astounding-awesome world of Divergent.

This blog was meant to write, share and let go of whatever frustrations I go through as an Indian student, teenage girl and a citizen of India.

Pick any blog and you might believe that you are actually reading a page from somebody's personal journal.

But here's the catch. This is not just a journal to unleash my emotions upon.

It's more like a diary of a modern Indian girl. A kid born in the late 90's in a middle class Indian family.

The beginning of an interesting journey

For somebody who learns from scratch, blogging definitely consists of a lot of NEW information. When I started the blog back in 2015 as a 12th board appearing student, it wasn't easy for me to sit with a laptop for so many hours. 

There were hidden aspects to it that I never knew would be consuming so much of my time.

I'm one of those kids whose families have high hopes attached with them, academically. And why wouldn't they, academics being the only thing I was good at.

No sports, no dancing, no extra curricular activities that required social interaction.

I was just another awkward teenager who lacked the confidence to try anything out of her comfort zone.

Growing up in a fairly privileged home

I had access to internet and computers from a very young age. And internet was a very fascinating thing back then, given how I was always indoors.

I could play dress-up games, I could read articles about fresh subjects that made me curious as a student. I could search for the lyrics to my favourite english songs. I even printed posters of my favourite singers to stick in my journals.

It was exciting. Getting an access to the whole world while staying indoors. Of course, I hated it indoors. But that was the only way I was conditioned to be.

I am a small town girl who had her home located on a very busy economic centre of the city. My parents didn't feel it was safe for me to go out, even during daylight. Even if it was as close as 3 feet away from our main door.

Conditioned to stay indoors

When I say I couldn't go as far as 3 feet away from my home, I MEAN IT.

We were threatened as children to not step anywhere outside. Sometimes, we were yelled at for escaping to the neighbour's home to play. Nobody thought it was weird because children are supposed to obey elders, and elders didn't want their children out on the road, or at a neighbour's place (enter extended fam dramas).

I remember being told once that I shouldn't stand on the terrace and look outside because people would look at me looking at them. Absurd, right?

The 12 year old me took this intent less rant a little bit too harshly. I couldn't step out on the terrace for weeks because I did not know if I was supposed to.

The most interesting thing to note here is the fact that all of this was pretty normal in our house. 

In fact, my 22 year old cousin still takes the brunt of our neighbours for being an odd human who is often caught strolling on his terrace at midnight.

Yes, even difficult for a guy his age. So imagine the conditioning we went through as children.

Finding an escape with Internet

My earliest memory of using the internet is finding cheat codes for GTA. I loved playing that game.

Growing up, it was a mix of games, research for school projects, music videos, downloading MP3s, social media and what not!